NYC Taxi logo: Thanks for seeing me, Shrink, I’m not the kinda guy that normally does this, you know, but Doc, I gotta talk to SOMEbody ’cause I’m going nuts here. See, I ain’t been feeling my usual regular self recently.

See Doc, for all these years I’ve been an iconic, beloved and stalwart symbol recognized throughout the world as a symbol of this great city. I represent this town. Everybody knows me, and I like it that way. But well, since I updated my look, things just ain’t been the same. I’ve lost my mojo, Doc. I feel like Steve McQueen in a bad cardigan and sweat pants or something. See, for as long as I remember I’ve been low-key, never trying too hard, just you know, your regular guy, doing his regular thing. Classic and cool, that’s my style. And now this. Check me out, Doc. It’s a full-on crisis. I feel all lame and ridiculous. Emasculating, Doc. I think that’s the word. I just don’t know what the hell happened. I don’t know how I came to look like this. 

Well, I guess it all started over a year ago and the wigs at the Taxi and Limousine Commission said to me, “Your look need to be refreshed. You need to bring your sorry ass into the 21st century. You’re all old school. Look at ya, with your old school text and all the letters the same size. And the periods after your “N” and your “Y” and your “C”. Come on, man.” And what the hell do I know about fashion, Doc? So, I trusted these people. I said, “Alright, maybe it is time for a change. I could use a refresh, What the hell!”

So they hired this fancy design firm to come up with something, and what they designed was this circle “T” thing. Frankly, I wasn’t crazy about it. I was like, “That’s it? A “T” in a circle?” But I figured it ain’t that bad. At least it’s straight-forward. So I thought I could get used to it. But then city officials said it wasn’t “flashy enough”. Flashy? Why flashy? What the hell is this “flashy”? I don’t want to be “flashy”; I just want to be me.

And that’s the thing, Doc. From all my experience on the street I can tell you that people who are visually illiterate ALWAYS go for “flashy” as a first instinct. There’s no love for the understated or the classic from people who just don’t know what the hell they’re talking about, Doc. I can tell ya that. City officials, what morons. Tell me how a bunch of bureaucrats, filling their day writing unnecessary reports and booking unnecessary meetings creating new layers of red tape should have any contribution to aesthetic decision making in areas of expertise for which they are untrained. It’s a farce, Doc. A farce I tell ya.

So yeah, somebody let them have their opinion and this is where bad goes to worse. See, the bureaucrats didn’t think the circle “T” was clear enough. Like people might get confused about what city they’re in and they might not realize that all these yellow vehicles with roof lights with a big “T” slapped on the side are actually taxi cabs! It tells you what the city officials think of the average intelligence level of regular people, don’t it? So the bureaucrats had the design folks to change me by adding “NYC” and “AXI” to the circle “T”.I’m like, whoa, hold on.  See, this is where I gotta take issue, Doc. See the original idea wasn’t conceived to have seven letters, see, just the “T”. But now if you change the rules, you hafta go back and revisit the design from fist principles. You don’t just add to what you already got. Too much stuff going on. And it’s got no flow, you know. Flow like instead of N. Y. C.  T A X I, like I used to be, see? Nice and even; it flows like your mother’s maple syrup or whatever. But now see, I’m now NYC-T-AXI. Looks like it’s supposed to be pronounced like “tuh-axi.” Stupid. But it don’t stop there, Doc.

Still with me here? Ok, well, get this. It turns out that the folks at the tourist bureau who call themselves NYC & Company, had already hired a different fancy design firm to design their own official city logo. But it ain’t got nothing to do with me, see? Separate thing, right? Well now these guys get all involved to complicate things even more and figured that the taxi cab logo should be consistent with their brand. Oh man. Total clusterfuck, Doc. Too many fricken cooks. First off you should see this design outfit’s fucking website. Ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that they’d come up with an assy logo for NYC. The font is all overbloated to the point that the letters are touching. No class. But everyone was like, “Well the NYC has to be consistent with the City’s official logo bla bla bla.” And everyone was all, “Yeah, ok that makes sense.” I picture all these suits sitting at a big table, not one of whom ever thought for a second what the hell it would look like if you combined three different ideas into one logo that has only seven letters! Design by committee, Doc: intended only to appease the parties involved, but not to make anything beautiful or cool. I tell ya.

It’s bad though, Doc. I feel like I got no rigour anymore, you know, like I lost my stride. My confidence. I’m all frivolous and whimsical. I feel like like people are laughing at me. And who can blame them? “Hey look at the logo that couln’t keep it together for only seven letters! ha-ha!” Doc, it’s true! I got only seven letters. But two font sizes, two different fonts and at least two different font spacings (I am actually going with three different spacings because the spacing between the “T” and “AXI” is greater than the other letters in “AXI” because of the fricken circle. I guess.) plus this circle thing! And why are the words bottom justified but at different heights?! Oh man. I can’t take it anymore. I used to be cool. I used to be normal and proper. Just a regular guy, just looking good because he’s being himself. Until this “design by committee” thing futzed me all up. 

Doc, you gotta help me, you got anything for what I got?

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